On Happiness

Heard this morning on NPR a new show on PBS entitled 'This Emotional Life'. The thing that stuck out the most was the secret of happiness from Larry David of Seinfeld, who said something like this:

"If you don't have a job that you like and you're not having sex, then you're not going to be happy."

I like the raw honesty of this definition, and of course the humor behind it. Daniel Gilbert, the host of This Emotional Life, expands on this and says if you're not doing something reasonable with your time and also not in a romantic relationship, then you're probably not going to be as happy as someone who is doing these things. It was an interesting interview.

People talk about happiness like a to-do list, searching for a formula to go by. I like to think of happiness as something ephemeral, a gem that warms you in moments of cold desperation. What would happiness be without misery? Law of averages might lead us to believe a happy person is glad most of the time. I don't know. These topics are a sign of the times. Impatience and the tendency to compare makes me believe that happiness is only a wish, a comparative perception of what could have been if if if... A child's laughter is so pure and loud. My dear friend described how all children run to the ocean, whereas adults walk to 'her'- amazing. Is happiness something inherent in us all? Over time, do we build a skin of grief and hesitance which covers our hearts from loving?

I've never felt loneliness as I do now living in Korea 2nd year. Always have been strong, independent and private, most of all comfortable being by myself- laughing at my own jokes. Big cities and crowds never intimidated me. Learning the logistics of a new environment was the uncertainty most concerning. But now it's different. Gibberish spoken whenever alone to fill the absence of an ear. I'm a gargoyle observing from a steeple. A silent statue and whenever it rains, a flood of words come rushing out left to drain into a sea of yesterday. Happiness is something that I want, but loneliness is something that I choose now.